Just Say No!:
This is your brain, this is your brain when you have so much stuff to do that you literally can’t do it all. That where saying NO comes into play. Saying no is harder than you might thing, try it. Someone asks you to join in on some committee for a volunteer organization, your church needs a Sunday school teacher or you are asked any number of things which add strain to your life.
It’s not that you don’t want to do these things, it’s not that you are lazy, it is the simple fact that there are 24 hours in a day and at a point you are booked solid and you didn’t leave any time for you.
You need to factor in time for you, again it’s not selfish, its not greedy or lazy. It is taking time for you to take a break and unwind a bit. You aren’t any good to anyone if you can’t focus, you are always tired or you are running late to everything.
But how to determine what to say yes to and what to say no to?
First Schedule 1 hour of time for yourself, odd huh? You don’t let anyone know that you are free during that time, you don’t give it up and you take time to be alone for a little bit. Once you are on YOUR time, you start to think about what you want in life, what are your goals? See my post about this. I do my best thinking in the shower, I can beat my head against a keyboard and then get into the shower and find instant clarity.
Now that you have determined your goals, you write down every commitment that you have and go through the list and ask yourself “does this get me closer to my goals?” If the answer is no, put an “x” next to it. There are those things like eat or sleep that are nonnegotiable. Of the things that put “x’s” on go through and determine how much time roughly you spend doing that thing during the week. The one that takes the most time take it and drop it! That’s it Drop it. Send an email saying that because of time constraints and responsibilities you have to your family etc. you need to stop doing whatever it is. Remember that with big commitments, you might have to phase it out, but you can get there.
Many of you at this point are saying I can’t do that! Its not possible! No I WILL NOT! Haha Now if this is one of those things like eat, sleep, take care of your child, then no, of course. But what would really happen if you said no (politely of course)? If you went to those people at the meeting that you have built a relationship with and said to them, I need to step back because I need to focus on my family, my relationship, my education. A true friend would see your good intention, listen to them and back you 100%.
Now I really encourage you to eliminate your most time consuming thing that doesn’t work towards your goals, but reality dictates that you have to eliminate the 2nd or 3rd instead. The end result is that you have just freed time to work towards a goal and also time for yourself, so protect it by just saying no.