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5 Reasons Most People Never Discover Their Purpose

A recent article came out from Inc. about why most people don’t discover their purpose in life and it inspired me to write this.

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People don’t define what is right for themselves.

I hear it too often, “I did it because I was supposed to”.  That common phrase might be one of the most dangerous phrases today in modern America.  If you are here reading this, there’s a good chance that you know this all too well.  When we grow up we often look to those around us who we trust to help us make decisions and we are smart to do so.  However, there comes a time when we must really start to rely on ourselves more and through introspection, learn what is right for us.  We can still seek the council of others, but as we grow, we must understand when to ask for help and more importantly who to ask.

Not taking the time for introspection and goal setting.

How crazy is it that we spend all this time doing things that may or may not make us happy, but we can’t take an hour to just think about what we are doing with our life.  Introspection is one of the strongest tools I’ve found to help me navigate life.  It brings clarity, it bring confidence, it spurs new ideas and it speaks to the soul.

Using introspection allows you do realize your dreams, but also grapple with your fears; both in productive ways.  Most people never take the time to do this, they do what they do because they are “supposed” to, but don’t take the time really think about things.

Most people are scared of their darkside

Most tiny housers are great people, but everyone has a darkside.  We aren’t talking about a darkside a la sociopath or the like; We are talking about your regrets, insecurities and selfish drives.  Everyone has them and it isn’t until we wrestle with them that we can make any real progress.  It has been my experience that the most amount of growth and understanding occurs in this space; where you face these dark parts of yourself and lean into them.  In some cases I have learned from them, other times I have come to accept them, or in some cases I have come to embrace them.  Whatever it is you have been intentional with them.

Too busy worrying about everyone else.

There are those who’s opinions you deem important, but for most people, we are too concerned with everyone’s opinion of us.  It’s only natural, but spending too much time worrying what others think about us is dangerous.

It is funny in a way, But I have found that those who are most likely judge you or chastise you are often the ones that are the most uncomfortable with themselves, haven’t found themselves, do what they are “supposed to do”, and haven’t decided things for themselves; why would you care about a person’s opinion that is so ill conceived and fraught with insecurities?

Seek the advice of those important to you, then go forth, ignore the rest.

People don’t “buck up” and go for it.

There has been one thing that I’ve found when it comes to people who are doing what they love, are well balanced, living an adventure.  They don’t let excuses get in the way and they act today.  I did this with my tiny house, I put it off, but in the end when I did it, I realized I, myself, was literally the only thing holding me back.

What is more tragic than a life where you don’t get to live your dream?  Having the chance to do something amazing and not jumping at the opportunity.
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Tiny House Weekend

So last week I had a crazy tiny house adventure.   It involved a potato, a few tiny houses, building codes and a lot of meeting tiny house folks.

I started off staying with Laura and Matt, two tiny housers in Asheville, Laura blogs at 120squarefeet.com (she also has a new book out – click here).   I have gotten to know them pretty well and always enjoy hanging out with them.  Not only do we talk about tiny houses, but we get to nerd-out too.

From there I met up with my brother and went to my favorite breakfast spot, Sunny Pointe.  After an amazing locally sourced organic breakfast we headed out.   From there we hit the Blue Ridge Parkway to see the fall colors.  I love driving the parkway, its winding roads and amazing views, it’s pretty hard to beat.  I dropped down from the parkway down into Brevard, saw looking glass falls and grabbed some lunch.

The next day I was off to Dan’s workshop where we talked about tiny houses.  I gave a talk on building codes and zoning.  After lunch Matt and Laura talked about their tiny house and living in it.  There were a lot of great questions for both presentations and the workshop allowed for us to chat with a lot of the folks.

 

The Science Of Happiness

Last week I wrote about how there were several common traits, one of which was being grateful.  Then I found this video about the science of happiness and it affirmed something for me.  Tiny House folks have always seemed to be much happier and from my post they also seemed very grateful; turns out there might be a correlation.

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Study of New Age Gypsy Culture

A recent book released by British photographer Iain McKell looks at the life of what some in society call the new age gypsies. McKell has gypsy wagon2followed a small group of these travelers for over 10 years and has recently released a new photo book on the evolution of their lifestyle. He represents the progression of this group through beautiful images of people who have chosen to live a tiny life on wheels. He tracks the movement from petrol based, motorized vehicle travel to the now more common horse-drawn wagons that this particular group uses.

Gypsy Wagon1Although they’ve turned to a more traditional mode of travel still found throughout Europe in the lifestyle of the Romani, McKell reflects that this does not mean complete isolation from society. He makes note in an interview he did with anothermag.com that these folks are using modern technology, including solar panels, laptops and social media, to stay connected to the world while they live travelers lives in wagons. His pictures are stunning and this foray into a subculture having nothing to do with the Romani culture is fascinating to me but I feel divided on the matter.

Gypsy WagonIt begs me to questions how the Romani might feel about westerners appropriating their lifestyle and how this impacts the view society has of their culture. As a ethnic group that has been, and continues to be, persecuted how does a community of western “new agers” impact the ideas and stigmas people have around this type of lifestyle. This western group of travelers is made up of the young, old, families, individuals, poor and rich alike so it’s not just one section of society being represented and while I love this tiny lifestyle and their anti-petrol approach, I have to wonder at the cultural appropriation that may be occurring in their choice of lifestyle.

Does this hold a negative connotation or not? Is it assimilation or appropriation? I’ll put away my contemplative hat for a minute but I think it’s worthwhile to ponder and if you are looking for more vardo inspiration check out Ryan’s post on this awesome wagon built by an archeologist!

 

Your Turn!

  • Do you itch for a gypsy lifestyle?
  • Would you pull your vardo by horse or by vehicle?

Via

 

 

Boardgames For Tiny Houses

One of my biggest hobbies is board gaming, there are times that I game a few nights a week.  I came to really love board gaming because of the personal interaction.  I haven’t used my xbox in about 4 years because with the advent of online gaming, you never have to gather as a group anymore, it wasn’t as fun anymore because it really lacked social interaction. With boardgames you get to sit across the table from friends, joke, laugh, and maybe even have some lighthearted smack talk.

So here is my top ten boardgames for a tiny house that also happen to be really small so you can fit them in any little nook in your tiny house.

lifeboatcover1. Lifeboat

The scene is set, you are stuck on a lifeboat after having to abandon ship, but supplies are running low and tensions are high!  Each person is dealt the identity of a person they hate and another of a person they love.  The name of the game is to stay alive, while you save your true love, but ensure your enemy finds their way out of the boat and into the treacherous waters.     Buy it here

8315495893_23b4e4a7bb_z2. Guillotine

It’s the French Revolution and the nobles are having a hard time of it.  They are lined up for their turn at the guillotine, the noble at the front of the line is next.  Each noble is worth a certain number of points, so its up to you to get the most points possible.  Sway the order of the line in your favor with bribes, tricks and other tom foolery.  Buy it here

fleet_top3. Fleet

Think of deadliest catch in a card game, that’s what Fleet is.  You are a fishing entrepreneur pitted against your rival fishermen and fisherwomen.   Bid for fishing licenses at auction, launch boats and hire captains as you build your fishing empire on the northern sea.  Buy it here

zombiedice4. Zombie Dice

This is a great quick dice game that brings a lot of drama and a fun theme of zombies.  Who doesn’t like zombies?  The dice have three symbols:  Brains if the zombies get you, a shotgun shot if you take one out, and feet if you end up fleeing.  The trick is to get as many zombies as possible before they get you.  If the zombies get you three times, you loose you points, if you play it too safe, you’ll be left behind.  Super simple, small, inexpensive and fun.    Buy it here

board_bang_shot15. Bang

You are in an old western town and it’s about to go down.  The sheriff in town tries to keep the peace, but there are people gunning for him.  In this game you are either the sheriff, deputies, outlaws or the renegade.  The problem is, no one knows who is who.  So in this game of six shooters, you battle it out with others, play hot potato with a lit powder keg and to restore health?…  Why you drink beer of course to shore up your hit points.    Buy it here

IMG_1073c cropped-thumb-300x260-627226. Saboteur

You and your Dwarven brethren are digging for gold deep in the mines.  All a sudden things start to happen that are beyond chance, its become aparent that there is someone in your group that is trying to foil the group’s plans and make off with the gold themselves.  Broken pick axes, extinguished lanterns and much more befall each other as you try to figure out who is the Saboteur, all while racing to the gold before time runs out.    Buy it here

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7. For Sale

The real estate market is a tough one and you as the new guy in town need to make a name for yourself as you buy and flip properties.  In this game you’ll learn how to bluff your way to victory as you climb the real estate ladder.  This is a great simple, but really fun game for kids because they can learn to count, but this is fun enough for adults too.    Buy it here

51BeRqtG3HL._SX385_8. Werewolf

This is a really great party game that has a ton of interaction and will leave you laughing for sure.  Your guide is the story teller of Miller’s Hollow.  He shares the tale of a werewolf that comes in the night to choose it’s next victim.  Everyone has a secret identity and you have to find the werewolf before he gets you, but stave of accusations as less scrupulous characters try to divert attention away from themselves and on to you!     Buy it here

51ERjMoDg8L._SX385_9. Citadels

This is a very popular game among gamers where you choose a role to play in the city and you build your empire.  Each game round players secretly take the roles of either the King, Magician, Architect, Assassin, Thief, Bishop, General, or Merchant and seek to use the powers of such offices in their efforts to win the game.  Buy it here

66915-1124-large10. Three Dragon Ante

After safely returning from a treacherous quest you and your compatriots settle down in a pub to tell the stories of your perilous journey.  At the pub you play Three Dragon Ante, where you bid on dragons to dominate your opponents.  From the people of D&D, but you’d never know if you hadn’t been told.  A fun quick card game.   Buy it here

 

What are your favorite board games that don’t take up a lot of room?

 

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